When the lives of many challenges, the desire for control, but it can be, of course. It is the illusion that if we are controlling events, and other ourselves, we are sure, successfully and safely. Unfortunately, the opposite is the case. More close, we handle, and handle, the more we will be out of control.
Especially in relationships, in which people feel vulnerable, where emotions are much higher and the high stakes, the desire for control. In the first of May, are owned by greed, all want to know what the partner dictate what they can or can not. Possessive often intensified. The power struggles erupt. It is the feeling that the person belongs to you and you have the right to express their choice and how their own lives.
It dominates the person and the freedom to lose, and well-being controlled. Although the prevalence can be said they did so out of love for the well-being of the partners, the bottom line is that anger and fear, it seems that the desire to control operations. Love always honour and respect the other, there is a person in the place of who they are, in their own change and discovery. It is not a question of adapting to a different life, but also to improve.
However, some very amusing control. They feel that if their partners are owned by greed and control, it means that care. This is a dangerous confusion. If one individual controls, it can still are completely safe and protected.
The Dynamics of Control
Plus it becomes out of control, it really is, the more the desire for control. The ability to control another person or the situation can be a sense of power, strength, authority, or the feeling that the world remains stable and secure. But we have more control over our own energy that we have to use them, for that vigil.
The control and domination can be addictive. It is a race against the regulations, that the person feels powerful, as if they are strong, and the beginning of the world, and often, the control can also be a rush sense of security, as if a great thing for somebody one. Sooner or later, all of the collapse.
Fear Of Domination
Another source of the strong desire to control others, the fear of domination. We do not want to be controlled. Although a lot of time for the approval and acceptance, but also fear dictates. The way this conflict is addressed by examining the others. They feel that when they do, control, nobody can lasso in their Indeed, they are themselves throw Lasso, loyalty, they need to control it. Many do almost everything, in order to give a sense of security. Of greater concern is not with a real sense of stability in us. This will happen if we do not live our core competences. The need for control, it is clear from it. It is essential to get in touch with our true source of true security in the stability, no matter what happens.
Exercise:
Who are you controlling?
Make a list of all the Controlling They are - or want to control. Add to that list. Remember how you dominate and control himself.
Stop Controlling,
Take a person on the list, you just have to leave No matter how much you wanted to control them, have you succeeded? Take note that the result. How did you feel? What Price did you pay?
Just make sure that it will enable them, just like they are. How do you find it now? What happens to your relationship? What happens to your own well-being and energy?
The granting of freedom itself, as well
But this exercise can be yourself.Allow with you, just as you are. Stop fighting, pushing, and the penalty itself for the way they operate. Take your own neck loop. How do you feel? What are the new routes may be for you now? What is your desire to infinity control itself does happens?
Because we know who is in the
Several people came to different conclusions about this part of the exercise. That’s fine. The purpose of this exercise is to become familiar with the issue. Spend your time with him. Dwell to the question “who is really control over your life and that of others? Let yourself betrayed the answer. Who is really the control of this world? Think about it. Once you have done all that we can control is what’s happening with you? What is the use of you life fighting? Is there another way to respond?